You Haven’t Written Anything Yet

WritersBlock

This is WordPress’ way of reminding me that my blog ain’t shit.

I’ve got some captive listeners, sure.  But I want to fill stadiums.  I feel like B-Rabbit in the movie 8-Mile, bobbing to the backing-track. If I could just link up a few words with some flow, maybe the floodgates would open.  The crowd is chanting, “Choke.  Choke.  Choke.”

Can I step into the rap-battle ring and drop a rhyme that will put the crowd in a frenzy, or do I have, “vomit on my sweater already, Mom’s spaghetti”?

I have some ideas, but none are worthy of a Tuesday.  Tuesday is a high traffic day.  It’s my chance to take those fifty-nine followers and make them sixty.  I had an idea called The Great Bidet Debate, but I can tell that a “toilet paper vs. water spray on rectum” debate isn’t what you guys are in the mood for.  Edit: I recently had The Great Bidet Debate.  Check it out here.

So instead, I’m metaphorically grounding into the final out of the American League Championship Series of 2105, like Josh Donaldson did.  I’m letting everyone down.

Akin to Donaldson’s folly in the ninth inning, this writer’s block is not my fault.  As there was on October 23, 2015, there is bad energy in the room now.

This is pointless.  I’m going to call NotOvine instead.

 

 

31 thoughts on “You Haven’t Written Anything Yet

  1. The first line 😂😂

    Don’t feel bad, I’m in writers block arena too. I have something to write about, it’s trying to get it started is the problem

    You’ll think of something, I have faith that the Sheep will rise above and conquer this Tuesday with flows reminiscent of 3rd Bass.

    Like

      1. Y’all not missing nothing up there. All it does is turn bad drinking memories into funny ones.
        It comes in all different flavors too.
        It’s one of those alcohols that’s on a list of what not to drink, but you know you experiment as a teen; thinking you’re being grown.
        What not to drink: Boones Farm, Night train, Cisco, Wild Irish Rose, and Mad Dog 20/20 and Steel Reserve(this last one is literally like 99 cents USD and you can get it from CVS, IT’S Horrendous🤢)

        Liked by 2 people

      2. We have some here too: Maximum Ice, Red Baron, any of the “buck-a-beers”. I steer clear of the strong stuff. There are a lot of craft breweries around here that have different stuff that tastes good.

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      3. We’ve learned to appreciate craft brews. You always find something interesting: flavors, design. Plus it feels good to support the small guy. We have a store called World Market here, they sell furniture, food, beers, wines from around the world. We usually find craft brews there.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Unfortunately, yes…the watermelon one. Wild Irish Rose isn’t much better. My teen friends and I moved on to Boone’s Farm wine. Then, the California Coolers came out (I’m showing my age).

        Liked by 1 person

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