This is WordPress’ way of reminding me that my blog ain’t shit.
I’ve got some captive listeners, sure. But I want to fill stadiums. I feel like B-Rabbit in the movie 8-Mile, bobbing to the backing-track. If I could just link up a few words with some flow, maybe the floodgates would open. The crowd is chanting, “Choke. Choke. Choke.”
Can I step into the rap-battle ring and drop a rhyme that will put the crowd in a frenzy, or do I have, “vomit on my sweater already, Mom’s spaghetti”?
I have some ideas, but none are worthy of a Tuesday. Tuesday is a high traffic day. It’s my chance to take those fifty-nine followers and make them sixty. I had an idea called The Great Bidet Debate, but I can tell that a “toilet paper vs. water spray on rectum” debate isn’t what you guys are in the mood for. Edit: I recently had The Great Bidet Debate. Check it out here.
So instead, I’m metaphorically grounding into the final out of the American League Championship Series of 2105, like Josh Donaldson did. I’m letting everyone down.
Akin to Donaldson’s folly in the ninth inning, this writer’s block is not my fault. As there was on October 23, 2015, there is bad energy in the room now.
This is pointless. I’m going to call NotOvine instead.