Cream of Broccoli Soup


All the fancy recipe sites like to tell a little story before they give you the actual recipe. It’s super annoying when you just want to get down to business and prepare dinner. So without further ado, let me proceed to be an annoying sheep.

When sheep evolved opposable thumbs, they picked up the phone and ordered pizza. When real sheep stood on all fours and shed their shitty sheep suits they learned to cook.

It’s still a little cold here so soup is still on the menu.

Step inside the kitchen of The Black Sheep.


2 stalks of broccoli

1 yellow onion

3 Tbsp butter

1/4 cup flour

1/4 tsp Thyme

1/4 tsp black pepper

1/2 tsp salt

1 carton chicken soup stock

2 cups grated cheese (use a jalapeno cheddar if you want some zing)

1/2 cup cream


The procedure:

Cut up that onion. If you’re not so confident on your knife skills, Gordon Ramsey can show you a thing or two in this video.

Cut all the florets off the broccoli and keep them off to the side.

Grab your big soup pot and turn that burner to medium heat.

Drop 1 Tbsp of butter in there. Once it’s sizzling, put the onion in the pot. Keep stirring it for 3-4 minutes until the onion is soft.

Add another Tbsp of that delicious butter and add half the florets. Add the salt, pepper, and thyme. Sir this around for a couple minutes until the broccoli gets soft.

Add another Tbsp of butter. Then add the flour and stir for about 30 seconds.

Slowly pour in the soup stock. As you pour, take a flat utensil and scrape the bottom of the pot to loosen all that yummy stuck on flavour.

Bring it up to a boil, then reduce heat to a simmer.

Set the timer for 10 minutes and go play your guitar.

Take your immersion blender (if you’re going to make soup you should have one of these). Blend that onion and broccoli to the desired thickness.

Go play guitar for another 10 minutes.  Practice makes perfect.

Important: Use your taster. Your mouth, that is. If the soup needs more salt, pepper, or your super secret special ingredient, now is a good time to add it.

Drop in the remaining florets.

Guitar time. You’ve just earned 10 more minutes.

Stir in the cheese slowly, until it becomes homogenous with the soup.

Stir in the cream. Serve.

Betcha didn’t see this post coming.

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