Banned: Umbrellas

Wear a raincoat or a nylon windbreaker. Lose the umbrella. They take up too much space, forcing innocent pedestrians off the sidewalk so Sir Umbrella the Great can pass. They poke people in the eye. They take forever to dry. The wind turns them inside out. They end up in the landfill. You can’t run with one. They are garbage.

Prime Dictator will ban the shit outta these so enjoy them while you can.


14 thoughts on “Banned: Umbrellas

  1. I wouldn’t oppose that ban. The problem is that a raincoat does not protect everything (i.e. whatever you might be carrying in your hands, shoes, backpacks, etc.). Maybe we should just have rain sacks with pants?

    Liked by 1 person

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